The longest drive home ever!

So this afternoon I was obsessively checking my home e-mail account from work (I do this about 8 times a day), and I finally found in my inbox the message I have been waiting for. A message from our agency, subject line: Pictures. OMG, my heart started racing! I frantically tried to open the files, I waited as the little hourglass turned over again and again…”Uploading File” my computer said…then suddenly “Unable to Open Files”. WHAT THE $&*#???

Apparently the files were too big for my dinky little remote inbox or something because it just totally froze up. Stupid e-mail account. Stupid *$^&!$#& computer. I tried again and the same thing happened. At this point I am frantic and ready to hit my monitor with a baseball bat. Thank goodness it was almost quitting time! So I left work 2 minutes early, even though I should have stayed late because I have a lot of work piling up on my desk, and I raced home! I have a half hour commute on a normal day, I think I made it home in about 22 minutes! I literally ran in the house causing my husband to wonder where the fire was or what in the world was wrong with me! I simply said “We have pictures!” and he totally understood of course! We opened up e-mail and there he was, our sweet little angel boy’s face! He’s so adorable, I can’t even tell you how cute he is! I immediately started crying of course and dh just hugged me. It was an amazing moment to see our son for the first time. Simply incredible.

And now I’m sorry to be a tease and tell you that I have pictures when obviously I haven’t posted any. I’m afraid I just don’t feel comfortable posting pictures on my blog until I know he’s ours for real. Don’t hate me…I know you all understand. But trust me he’s a cutie!

Now we are STILL waiting on our I-171H. I know, it’s only been like 2 mail days since I was whining about this the last time but come on already! We did get our passports today so that’s something at least. I’m keeping my fingers crossed for more goodies tomorrow!

More news today

We got a few more tidbits about our boy yesterday. The ladies from the agency visited with him and his foster mom on Tuesday and e-mailed us a brief report. Apparently his foster mom "P" is married with a 6 yr old but they didn't say if it's a son or daughter. They said P was excited about the package and was happy to get the disposable camera so I'm hoping that means she's eager and willing to take some pictures for us! She said that our baby is eating and sleeping well and appears in good health, which of course is wonderful to hear! The people from the agency also were able to take pictures and video and they are going to send them to us next week when they return from their trip. I can't wait to finally see my baby boy, this is so exciting!

Oh, and I think I'm finally ready to go public with our baby's name, so to those of you who don't know already it's Cameron! I know I said we were going to wait until we saw his picture to decide for sure, but we were pretty sure about it even before we got the referral and we've been calling him that for a while, so I guess it's official now! I can't wait to put a face with the name! :)

Finally a little update

I e-mailed our consultant at the agency last night and politely asked why we hadn't received any updates of any kind on our little boy since the initial referral and if this is normal (it's been over 5 weeks since we accepted the referral). We had been told that some of the staff was traveling there this week and were supposed to bring back updates but I just couldn't wait until next week to hear something!

Anyway, I'm glad I bugged her because she e-mailed back right away this morning and apologized for the lack of info so far. She said that because the staff was traveling down this week our attorney's office had not been sending updates since they would be there to get them in person. She did confirm that our dossier and check were received by our attorney and that our paperwork was being translated and legalized though so things are moving along. And of course they need our I-171H before we can move on with DNA testing, but they are doing what they can.

Then she said that the 2 ladies who went down to Guatemala from the agency were meeting with our attorney today and will be filming and getting updates on as many of the babies as they can. She said that our son was first on the list since he was one of the most recent referrals! They should be bringing back a copy of his medical info to date, and will send this and the pics and video out to us as soon as they can next week sometime. She did caution us to be patient since they were visiting 50 or more children so it may take time to sort through everything and get it sent out, but we should definitely get to see our little boy very soon! Woo-hoo!

So it's not much but it's enough to get me through the week! Now PLEASE Mr. Postman can you deliver us our I-171H? Pretty please?

Nursery Idea

TGIF!! I'm so exhausted, this has been a long week! We still have no updates on our son. We are trying to be patient but is this normal?? I know someone (I think Kim) told me they never even saw a picture of their son until they went to visit so I guess it could be. At least we know the agency staff is traveling to Guatemala next week so we *should* find out something when they get back if not while they are there.

In the mean time I am still pondering the nursery situation. I pretty much decided the room needs a change so I'm not going to do Winnie the Pooh. It's adorable, but since I have plenty of time I want something new and different. And about a year and a half ago I got the cutest fabric to make a baby quilt for my dear friend Kerri and I liked the print so much I went back and bought what was left on the bolt! I didn't realize I had so much of this print until I went through my stash, but I have almost 4 yards so I think that's plenty to do something with in the room. My only concern is that the colors are TOO bright and obnoxious. So I scanned a picture of the print and the stripe fabric I have to coordinate with it and I'm looking for some honest opinions. I would tone it down with some other solid fabrics or less busy prints but is it still too much?

I wish I had something to talk about...

Well...I really have nothing new to talk about today. I have actually been in kind of a funk so far this week and I'm just really tired and crabby. I think now that we are full force into the waiting game portion of this adoption I'm hitting a bit of a depression stage. It was all such a rush to get everything done and sent out and now suddenly we have nothing to do but wait and wonder what is happening. Things are no longer within my control and I don't like it! And no, we still have not gotten any pictures or updates on our son which is just adding to my frustration.

And of course we were so excited when we got our referral that we told EVERYONE about the baby, which is now turning around and biting me in the butt since people keep asking if we've heard anything. And though it's nice that people are excited for us and care what's happening, it just makes me more crabby because over and over again I have to say "no news". I knew this would happen too...I should have known better...but I couldn't keep our good news a secret any longer! Oh well.

In the mean time I am trying to decide how I want to do the baby's room. I say how "I" want to do it rather than "We" because my husband doesn't seem to care very much. I wish he would show a little more interest but ok, fine. So I am on the fence about going with a Winnie the Pooh theme and using all of the Pooh stuff I already own (which is a lot...I have always loved Pooh and have quite a collection), or go with something completely different. I found a cute crib set at Target that is the Classic Pooh collection that I really liked, but now I'm afraid it is discontinued because online it looks like a lot of it is out of stock and at our store there was hardly anything on the shelf. Typical. So then my next idea was to do something like a jungle theme with cute jungle animals and stuff and I have seen a lot of varations of this theme out there. This is probably what I want more than the Pooh stuff which I am a little sick of, but I'm also thinking about saving money and using the Pooh theme would be cheaper since I have so much decor already. Ah, decisions, decisions. I guess I'll just have to do some shopping and some pondering and figure out what I want to do! Any suggestions?!?

Good news today!

We got an e-mail from the agency today letting us know our dossier had arrived and they were going to just look it over quickly then send everything off to our attorney today! Fantastic! I'm amazed at how quickly they turned that around at the Consulate's office and sent it out! Incidentally, they did NOT use the pre-paid mailer tracking number I had sent so it's a good thing I was not compulsively watching it for the last 3 days!

Then I sent out our first half of the country fee today so I have another package to track! That means our check and the dossier packet should arrive at the same time which seems like a good thing. Now if only the I-171H Gods would shine on us and we could that that in the mail quickly we will be set! I know it will be a while yet for that but at least things are moving along now after 3 weeks of nothing!

And last but not least I sent out a package to our sweet little boy today. It's a flannel blanket that I made for him along with this cute little outfit (OshKosh B'Gosh of course) and a disposable camera with a note for the foster mom that my wonderful sister-in-law translated for me. Hopefully everything arrives safely at it's intended destination, though I feel confident that it will be fine since the agency staff is bringing it. I was really emotional about sending everything for some reason, I think that knowing this was going to our baby really brought a sense of reality to the situation that I hadn't felt as much up until now. It's hard to explain. Anyway, I hope he likes everything! :)

Seriously annoyed!

I'm so annoyed at our *bleep* *bleep* *bleeping* medical insurance carrier I could seriously scream right now!

Ok, let me tell you the situation. My husband's company changed insurance carriers this past year to get better rates and better coverage. Ok, great...but the doctors we had been going to were no longer covered and we would have to switch. Crap. We put it off as long as possible but we both needed physicals for our home study and we had to take the plunge. So we go to the web site, find a new doctor, call to make sure they are accepting patients, have all our records transferred, the whole deal.

So then today I went out on their website to just take a peek at pediatricians (may as well add one more item to my list of things to stress over, and besides I was killing time at work). So I'm looking up doctors in our area and I noticed there were some listed from the clinic we used to go to...the clinic we discontinued going to because the new insurance didn't cover our old doctors. At this point I'm thinking it's weird that they would cover pediatricians from there and not regular family practitioners and I get suspicious. Would those *bleep* *bleep* *bleepers* go and add doctors from our old clinic to their list of providers only a couple of months after we went through all the hassle of switching? Oh yes, those jackasses sure as hell did! I did a search and found that both mine and my husband's previous doctors are now covered by our insurance! What the $#&*??? I'm so pissed right now I can't even believe it! I mean, I LIKE my new doctor, I really do, but I liked my old doctor too and she actually knew me whereas this new woman is vouching for my health and sanity on our adoption paperwork when she has seen me once before in her life!

I guess it's water under the bridge at this point and I don't plan on changing back but it's sure annoying. Stupid *bleep* *bleep* *bleepers*. I hate insurance!

Another check mark on the to-do list

We had our fingerprint appointment this morning, one more thing to say we have "complete"! The actual appointment was a piece of cake, the drive to downtown Milwaukee through heavy construction was not. I looked up how to get there on Mapquest (my favorite) and thought we were all set until we discovered the exit we needed was either closed or no longer there so we couldn't get off the highway where we expected to! We ended up taking the next exit which landed us in a not-so-friendly looking neighborhood, but thankfully we went right past a police station so we stopped there for directions! It turns out we weren't too far off track and we managed to find the place no problem with the officer's help, though I feel certain if we hadn't asked for directions we might still be driving around looking for the place! Thankfully we had left plenty early so even after our detour, a lot of swearing and a minor crying fit we managed to make it to our appointment with a few minutes to spare!

When we got home I had an e-mail in my inbox from the agency so of course I got really exciting thinking it was an update and picture...no such luck. Our case worker was just checking in and wanted to let us know that some of the staff are traveling down to Guatemala at the end of the month and hope to be able to get video and pictures of all the new babies that have been referred recently. She said hopefully we'll get some pictures of our son after they return in early February! Wait, did she say February?!? Oh yeah, she did. I realize that there probably aren't a lot of Guatemalan foster mothers running around with their digital cameras and e-mailing the attorney's every other day with new pictures but come on people, I can't wait until FEBRUARY!!! So anyway, I nicely e-mailed back and asked if there was any possibility that we would get something sooner and she reminded me for the 15th time that our attorney has been on vacation and was just back today so to be patient because they are probably backed up after the holidays. So ok, I'm being patient but that doesn't mean I have to like it! (Insert heavy sigh of frustration here.)

The good news is I can send a package to our son with the staff so at least that is something. I made him a little receiving blanket out of 2 pieces of flannel slapped together and topstitched and I want to send a disposable camera. Then if there is room in my zip-lock bag I may send a little outfit too, but I don't want to send too much since they have to hand carry this stuff. So I have to get this stuff together and sent out ASAP...just when I get one thing marked off the to-do list I add another! Typical!

Can anyone recommend a good book or two on Guatemalan culture and history? I would like to learn a little more about the place my son was born before I go there so I can understand and appreciate it more. Plus I figure I better do so now while I actually have the time because once that boy comes home I know I won't be doing much casual reading!

One step closer

We FINALLY got the finished/signed/notarized copy of our home study yesterday so this morning I was able to package up all my precious dossier documents and FedEx them out to the Consulate in Chicago! It was such a relief to get that stuff out of my house, I have had irrational fears that all of these letters, documents and seals we have collected would get water spilled on them or burn up in flames or something before we could send them!

Now that they are out of my hands however, I have been obsessively tracking the package (which has been picked up but apparently has gone nowhere as of 5pm today) and anxiously awaiting it's arrival tomorrow morning. Then I can begin obsessively checking the return air bill number to see if it has left the Consulate and arrived at the agency! And now of course I have an irrational fear that FedEx is going to lose my package or the address is wrong or I filled out the air bill wrong or one of our documents needs to be redone or SOMETHING bad will happen! I know, I'm a little psycho about this. Perhaps I should have just taken the day off of work to drive down to Chicago and drop the envelope off in person at the Consulate's office, wait for them to seal everything there (which probably takes a while but honestly I have no clue) and then drive it up to our agency's office in Michigan? Sounds like a valuable usage of my time. Have I mentioned that I obsess over things?

So anyway, we are finally one step closer to bringing our little boy home, or at least closer to getting the process started in Guatemala since everything has been at a dead standstill for 2 weeks now. I'm still a bit annoyed at our social worker for taking SO LONG to get our home study finished (our final meeting was December 2nd so it took a full month to get a final copy), but since our attorney in Guatemala was also unavailable until next week it didn't really make much difference in the long run anyway. Now the real waiting begins... :(

Wow, I finished something!

Remember that quilt project that I was talking about in this post? The one I was going to maybe finish that weekend or soon after? Well, I didn't quite get it done as quickly as I hoped, but I finally finished it yesterday! Check it out!

The pattern is called "Hidden Star" though unfortunately the stars ended up being a lot more hidden than I had expected. If you look closely at the red fabric, those triangles do make the outline of a star, but the contrast fabric (blue with flags) isn't enough of a contrast to bring it out. Oh well. It's only a lap quilt for myself so I don't care! It's warm and snuggly and I love it! So do my kitties, and as it turns out it's a kitty cat cuddle magnet! I love to cuddle with my kitties, too bad the thing is already full of cat hair though! Drat! (Kim, does this look familiar?)

I think my next project is going to be something super cute for our baby boy! I already have some fabric in my stash that I think I'm going to use that will be perfect! I feel inspired now, I have to keep this momentum going! And hopefully keeping busy will help pass the time until he is home with me! The agony of 2 weeks with no news is killing me, what will I do for the next several months? Agh!!