Out and about

I spent the last few months not saying much about our adoption to people other than close friends and family because it was so early on in the process. But now that we are approved for the home study and on the waiting list for our baby I feel ready to take the plunge and be a lot more open about it. However, now that I am ready to talk I'm finding it's awkward to bring it up and I even get kind of nervous when I talk about it. It's weird because I am completely and totally excited about adopting and I'm eager to share this excitement with the rest of our friends, but I think maybe my problem is that I'm actually this really shy person and to have such big and exciting news puts me in a spotlight that I don't feel comfortable being in. I guess I better get over it because more and more people are going to find out now, you know how word-of-mouth goes! Maybe we let the cat out of the bag too soon?

So anyway, now we are "out" and I find it to be a big relief but it's also a strange feeling. I spent the last 4 years of my life avoiding babies and anything related to them, and now I find myself looking for cribs online during my lunch break! I also broke down and bought some clothes for our as of yet unknown bundle of joy, even though I swore I wouldn't do that until we had a referral and knew for sure it was a boy (we said boy was our first choice since the agency said there was nobody on the waiting list for boys, but we would be open to a girl too). But I couldn't help it! You see, I work for a children's clothing company and this past week for Christmas they offered us "employee appreciation" which was 40% off at our outlet store. Well I went there to buy clothes for our niece and nephew but I left with a sac full of clothes for our baby too! I found deals that I just couldn't pass up, and so much cute stuff! I got one little 0/3 month outfit that I hope to send in a little care package and the rest I got a little bigger in the hopes that he hasn't outgrown it by the time we get to see him! I guess I'm getting excited now...too bad we won't probably have any news on a referral until after the holidays but you never know!

Speaking of the referral, I'm not exactly sure how long that will take now. We decided to specify 2 different contacts in Guatemala that we would prefer to work with because they are faster than some of the others. (Thanks so much to Kim for the advice!) So it could take a little bit longer to get a referral, but we decided we would much rather wait for that and then possibly be able to bring our baby home younger. In the mean time we can get all of our paperwork done as far as we can and be "ready" when we get the call! I guess we better get cracking and decide on some names! :)